i smile wherever i go, i will play, laugh and go on
you will see me flowing by looking fine as hell,
moving to the bass in the music and ease of the smoke 'up in the club'.
we would briefly lock eyes, the curve in my lips shining with that twinkle in my eye.
i will call on my gals to get ready,
wine and dine and be silly, flirt a little,
sing for a while
dance up a sweat.
doing it, n doing it, n doing it well!
but listen this is when i'm not hiding, dazed confused , fantasizing bout you,
not doing and doing everything fighting,
fighting you off.
YOU DRIVE ME CRAZY!
i miss you so much, even when we are fighting, even when i speak of 'us' in the present.
do you think of me at all?
this heart is broken. Trying, singing its heart out, pressing forward and regretting not kissing you that one last time, but dont get me wrongit was broken before you.
look i love you. iw ished you were the 1 they called the 1, everytime you touched me.
i smile wherever i go. i will play, laughand go on
you will see that child-like, tormented person there is if you come close enough
i have to get everything you made me feel, early in the morning, buzzing...losing control.
could i have you in any deeper?
but like i said this soul shifted a while back;
when HE used to take his time.
when HE used to treat me like a lady, praise me, show me off.
when i let HIM hold me all night.
this heart was broken back when HE made me smile from so far away.
the times when being close was in bed.
HE who made it so that the neighbours heard, knew our business.
the ONE who was right next door, my longest, easiest, most true, happiest, most unmendable.
my heart still broke that one night of pure lust and temptation.
the games that i played.
the lies i told, the minds i messed with
that night when U reminded me that it still hurts when i remember.
my heart breaks, flows out of my ears, eyes, this pen...
did i tell you i missed you. i'm not quite sure what to do.
but its done already, i know that.
what were we thinking?
i dont blame you.
i'm not a victim, this heart has long broken.
but i smile wherever i go, i will play, laugh and go on.
... to be continued
Gino Obuseng
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